Relationships are hard. They take work and sacrifice, but most importantly, they require communication. This can be difficult for typical couples, but it can be even more challenging for military couples. Things like deployments, reassignments and training can make it difficult to talk out your problems. Check out the advice below for maintaining healthy communication in your military relationship.
Choose your battles wisely
Is it really necessary to pick a fight over the small things? Most psychologists recommend waiting for at least 48 hours before addressing an issue. This allows a person enough time to process his or her emotions and decide if the topic is really worth hashing out. This will prevent anger or sadness from controlling the conversation. If you wait, you may even decide that a problem wasn't really that big of a deal after all and skip an argument altogether.
Have important discussions face to face
Long distances can sometimes mean having to get creative with communication methods. However, if there is an issue in your relationship that you want to work out, try to avoid doing so over video chat, text message or other digital communication methods. Wait until you can be in the same room with the person. This can eliminate the risk of being misunderstood through technology, and the in-person talk will allow you to see how the conversation is affecting the other person.
Be clear and concise
Always remember that your spouse is not a mind reader. He or she will not know there is a problem unless you tell them. When you choose to have this discussion, make your point well and avoid tip-toeing around the issue. Passivity may confuse your spouse and lead to further complications. A clearly laid out problem will likely lead to a more satisfactory resolution.
Actively listen
Any time you and your partner discuss something, be committed to the conversation. Nothing ignites anger and hurt feelings quicker than being ignored. If you setup to have a conversation, make sure you are mentally present and actively engaged in hearing your loved one out.
Communication is a big part of maintaining a healthy relationship. Military couples are put through more challenges than most other couples, but they have equal opportunities to work toward strong communication skills. The advice above is a good place to start when trying to improve your spousal communication.