When a servicemember is deployed, his or her family members experience many different emotions. Deployment is especially difficult for children, as they will be faced with feelings they likely do not understand. AFBA has compiled five tips to assist you in helping your children cope with deployment.
1. Establish a routine
By bringing back an established pattern into your children's lives, you can help alleviate some of the stress that they are already experiencing. Having a parent leave for service can be a confusing time. A routine will give your children some sense of control and regularity. Try to stick to the same bedtimes and wake-ups if possible. You can also give your children daily chores to keep them busy and on-task. While routines may seem tedious, they can be a lifeline for children coping with a major life change like deployment.
2. Open lines of communication
The deployment of a parent may inspire some strong emotions in your children. It is important to let them know early on that you are available to talk about these feelings. You should also share your own emotions with them, so they realize that they are not going through the experience alone. Your chats do not have to be formal or scheduled. Just check up on them from time to time or ask them how they are feeling over dinner.
3. Allow for emotional outlets
One of the worst things you can do for your children during their parent's deployment is chastise them for expressing their emotions. This does not mean you should allow them to throw tantrums to get rid of their anger. Instead, you should help them find healthy ways to deal with their reactions to missing their parent. Buy your children journals and encourage them to write or draw what they are feeling.
4. Put them in a peer group
There will be times when your children do not want to discuss things with you. Instead of getting frustrated with them, understand that this is normal. Give them the chance to communicate with their peers who may be experiencing the same thing. There are a number of summer camps and activity programs designed specifically for children of military personnel. Your children may find strength and support by surrounding themselves with other children whose parents are also deployed.
5. Work through it together
It is important to let your children know that they are not alone in missing their mother or father. Deployment is a time you should help one another through. You can make your children feel important by explaining to them that you will need extra assistance around the house now that you are without your spouse. Additionally, there are a variety of activities designed to bring you closer, even during a tough time like deployment.
There are a wide range of emotions your children may experience during their parent's deployment. Your children may be unable to cope with all of these feelings on their own. That is why AFBA outlined some helpful ways for you to make sure your kids can work through these emotions in a healthy way.
Being a first responder is a tough job. Firefighters, police officers and emergency medical technicians put their lives on the line to ensure the continued safety of their communities. These individuals go about their jobs without expecting praise, but one Ohio amusement park dedicates two days every year to thanking first responders. Kings Island, the largest amusement park in the Midwest, is the host of Fire and Safety days.
This year's Fire and Safety days will take place on Aug. 29 and 30. The park will offer free admission to all active duty first responders. Firefighters, emergency medical technicians and police officers must present a valid form of identification to receive this offer. Kings Island will accept badges if they are accompanied by a photo ID. First responders will also have the option to purchase up to six admission tickets for their family and friends at almost half the original price.
During Fire and Safety days, park guests will have the opportunity to learn CPR, explore emergency vehicles and learn safety tips. In addition to those activities, the first 1,000 kids to enter the park will be given a fire hat of their own.
On Aug. 20, two female servicemembers will join the ranks of the Army elite as they become the first women to graduate Army Ranger school. In January, the Pentagon made the decision to include women in the training program. Since 1950, when the Army Ranger school was created, only men had been allowed to participate. It is a grueling program where participants are allowed one meal a day and only a few hours of sleep. Despite all that, they must endure some of the most strenuous combat training drills in the world.
The Pentagon was initially withholding the names of the female graduates. As of Aug. 19, their names have been released to the public. The women who have made military history are 26-year-old Kristen Griest and 25-year-old Shaye Haver. Both women, graduates of the prestigious West Point, will return to their units after their graduation at Fort Benning, Georgia.
Only 40 percent of participants finish the program. Of the 18 women who started the program in April, Griest and Haver were the only two who completed it. Because of their accomplishment, the Pentagon is considering allowing women to become a part of the Army Ranger school permanently.
First responders in the Detroit metropolitan area are some of the hardest working first responders in the nation. These individuals sacrifice their time and put themselves on the line to make the community a safer place for civilians. The Detroit Lions found a way to thank these hardworking individuals for their service and commitment.
At their practice on Aug. 17, the Detroit Lions hosted about 1,500 first responders. The practice, the team's second away from its home field, was held at Edsel Ford High. The school's stands were full of local firefighters, police officers and emergency medical technicians. The practice, which is normally closed to the public, serves as the final training camp preparation outside the Allen Park facility.
The Lions management and the players invited the 1,500 first responders from the surrounding area for a private viewing of the practice as a gesture of gratitude.
"To have an opportunity to visit with them, talk with them, share this night with them, is pretty special," Jim Caldwell, the Lions coach, told The Detroit News. "I don't think until there's some sort of a national catastrophe that they actually get their due and respect."
On Monday, Aug. 17, the Pentagon announced it would be sending active duty military personnel to assist with wildfires in the western part of the country. About 95 fires are burning across seven states, including California, Washington, Nevada and Colorado. The wildfires have scoured over 1 million acres of land and have cost the Forest Service about $100 million every week. Many people have been forced to evacuate their homes in the areas. In California alone, 13,000 firefighters are stretched thin while combating 19 large fires.
The Pentagon has dedicated 200 active duty personnel to assist the firefighters. According to CNN, military servicemembers have only been engaged to fight fires 35 times in the last 30 years, and this is the first time since the early 2000s. The military personnel will take over the smaller, less aggressive fires.
"[The soldiers' assistance] is important because it frees up our more experienced crews to handle more complex dangerous fire situations," Ken Frederick, the National Interagency Fire Center spokesperson, told CNN.
The 200 soldiers will be divided into 10 groups of 20 members and deployed across the region. The soldiers' presence will not only take pressure off the civilian firefighters, but it will alleviate some of the stress on the Forest Service budget.
Aug. 21 will be a historic day for the Army Ranger program. For the first time since the school's beginning in 1950, a woman has finished the grueling 61-day training program. In fact, two women completed the training and will graduate with the rest of the class at Fort Benning, Georgia. The names of the women have not been released, but NPR reported that they are both in their 20s, graduated from West Point and are ranked as lieutenants.
For decades, the Army Ranger School admitted only men. In January, the decision was made to allow women into the program. Ranger School is an exhausting combat training course. Only 40 percent of the trainees graduate what is frequently referred to as the most difficult combat training program in the world. For two months, participants are subjected to combat drills in the mountains of Georgia and in the swamps of Florida.
"This course has proven that every soldier, regardless of gender, can achieve his or her full potential," Secretary of the Army John M. McHugh told CNN.
Of the 19 women who were part of the trial inclusion, the two program finishers will be given the coveted Ranger patch. However, the Pentagon has decided that they will not be allowed to apply for the 75th Ranger Regiment, an elite special operations force.
On Aug. 22, Deer Grove East Forest Preserve in Palatine, Illinois, will host the First Responders Family Fest 2015. The event was created to give first responders and their families a day of fun in thanks for their service to the community. There will be a youth run and a 5K walk/run. Local firefighters, police officers and EMTs will compete with locals in the First Responders Obstacle Course Challenge.
Vendors and local sponsors will have demonstrations that showcase the daily service and sacrifice of first responders. One of the sponsors is even raffling off a big-screen television. There will also be a tug-of-war competition between local police and fire crews, and the day will end with an all-inclusive water balloon fight. The winner of the events will be awarded with a trophy and half the event's proceeds. The second- and third-place winners will also receive a trophy.
From 8:30 a.m. to 1:00 p.m., first responders and their families are able to relax, enjoy the day and receive praise from the citizens they serve every day. The event is free, but registration is required for some of the events.
For more information on the event, click here.
Deployment is a difficult time for military families. Exchanging letters, email and video calls can help combat the feelings that accompany separation, but many soldiers still long for the familiar luxuries from home. One thing military families can do for their heroes is send care packages. There is nothing like being halfway across the world from everything and everyone familiar and receiving a big box of your favorite items from home. AFBA has complied a list of items to include in your next care package.
Personal care items
The military provides soldiers with personal hygiene products, but some specialty items are not included. Your servicemember is hard at work most days, so sending a tub of IcyHot or other topical pain reliever can really make his or her day. Things like lip balm and exfoliating body washes are also appreciated. However, package any items that could leak in a Ziploc bag to avoid contaminating the rest of the package. Servicemembers also spend a great deal of time on their feet. Keep your soldier's feet dry and comfortable by sending cushioned camping socks and gel insoles regularly.
Activities for downtown
While your servicemember will have his or her fair share of action, there is still plenty of downtime. Send some items to combat boredom, such as movies and video games. iTunes gift cards and mp3 players are another luxury your servicemember is sure to appreciate. However, there may not always be a way for them to play or watch. Include non-digital items like books, puzzles, board games and decks of cards in your care package.
Reminders of home
Even though your servicemember is busy, he or she will inevitably get homesick at some point during deployment. By including photos of the family, the house and favorite places around town you can give them a piece of home to carry along. Handwritten letters are great care package items. While email may be faster, there is something special about reading the handwriting of loved ones as they wish you well. If you have the opportunity, you could also pack home videos that include messages from friends and family, the baby's first steps or a younger sibling's graduation. USB drives can hold quite a few photos and videos, and they fit well in care packages.
Special foods
The military makes sure that your servicemember will never go hungry, but many soldiers find the food repetitive and bland. A care package is the perfect opportunity to send along some luxury food items. Veteran United Network recommended including a bottle of your servicemember's favorite sauce or condiment from a local restaurant to give the package that extra personal touch. Typical American snacks like beef jerky, potato chips, sunflower seeds and hard candies are always appreciated. Make sure the food is non-perishable and will not be crushed or leak during shipping.
Deployment is rough on both servicemembers and their families, but care packages are a great way to connect. They help families feel like they are there for their servicemembers, even when they cannot be physically present, and it gives the soldiers something to look forward to.
Active duty military personnel and first responders have some of the most stressful careers. The day-to-day demands of their jobs can sometimes cause that stress to trickle over into off-duty life. AFBA has compiled eight activities to help servicemembers and first responders relax.
1. Practice some yoga
Yoga is great for relaxation because it is low impact but it still releases pent-up energy from your body. It is an activity that forces you to focus inwardly and shut out the rest of the world. Not many yoga routines exceed a half-hour, so you can do a quick session after work to leave behind the stress from the day.
2. Read a book
Sometimes you just need to leave reality behind. Books are the perfect way to transport yourself into a different world and take a glimpse into someone else's life for a while. Aside from providing an excellent distraction, reading is scientifically proven to have a calming effect on the mind.
3. Engage with music
There are many ways in which music can help you de-stress. One of the simpler ones is to put on some headphones and crank up your favorite tunes. Focusing on the rhythm and lyrics can help you forget about any anxiety from the day. Dancing is another relaxing activity involving music. Whether you go to a club or just cut a rug in your own home, dancing helps you shake off stress and let loose. A third option for de-stressing with music is to play an instrument. Many people find that strumming a guitar or tapping on a keyboard relieves frustration and relaxes them.
4. Do some exercise
Scientists have backed physical activity as a way to relieve stress for decades. However, as military personnel or a first responder, your job can sometimes be physically demanding. You may not have the energy to go for a run after a long shift. Don't worry. A walk around the block or an easy bike ride through the park can have the same relaxing effect.
5. Play with pets
If you own a cat or dog, take some time when you get home to snuggle or play fetch. Giving attention to your furry friend can help you let go of the pressures of the day and enjoy a social interaction with no ulterior motive. Even if you live in a place where pets are not allowed, you can volunteer at your local shelter to clock some time with a cuddly critter or two.
6. Visit your favorite place
Everyone has that spot that immediately makes them happy. Maybe it is a secret bench in the park or a rooftop with a great view. Wherever you find peace and comfort, take an evening and spend some down time there. You are sure to unwind where you feel most at home.
7. Take a drive
As long as you do not venture out during rush hour, driving can be a relaxing activity. If the weather is nice, crank up your radio and roll down your windows. A drive through a scenic area of town could be just the thing to help you forget about your worries.
8. Cook a meal
You have to eat anyway, right? Instead of ordering take-out, spend some time experimenting in the kitchen. The novelty of preparing a meal you have never tried will encourage your creativity and may distract you from the pressures of your day. Additionally, biting into your delicious concoction will eradicate whatever stress may have followed you home.
As military personnel or a first responder, stress may be an inevitable part of the job. However, that does not mean it has to ruin your off-duty time. Find out which of the eight activities above work best for you and use them to help you unwind.
For military personnel and first responders, transfers are always possible. It can be difficult to leave behind the life you have established in one city or area. It can be even harder to say goodbye to friends and stationmates. These individuals have been through similar experiences and you have formed close bonds. However, your career is one where moving may not be an option. Making friends in a new base or station house can be difficult, but it can also make the adjustment easier. AFBA has outlined some tips to assist you in meeting new people after a transfer.
1. Take advantage of technology
There are plenty of websites dedicated to helping people meet for a romantic relationship, and this is equally true for those seeking new platonic relationships. Before you move, join a friend finding website and look for people in the same line of work as you in your new area. Who knows? You may even establish a connection at your new base or station before you make the transfer. There are also apps designed to help people meet new friends. The apps ask you to list your interests and then generate a list of activities where like-minded people will be hanging out. Technology can connect you with people in your new area long before you ever move.
2. Step out of your comfort zone
Sometimes this is easier said than done, but it is an effective way to make new friends. Join an organization that involves your interests to establish connections with people who enjoy the same things you do. You can also find classes, either fitness-oriented or hobby-based, and use them as a way to introduce yourself to a new group of people. The fear of rejection keeps most people from reaching out to those around them, but if you can overcome this feeling, you will find yourself in a position to make plenty of new friends.
3. Get old fashioned
Not many people know their neighbors anymore. When you get to your new base or station house, do not be afraid to make the rounds. Introduce yourself to your new neighbors and stationmates. You may not make friends with all of them, but at least you have established a connection and opened the lines of communication. Most people will probably appreciate your outgoingness and welcome you into your new community. Another great opportunity to make new friends is to host a housewarming cookout on base or invite your new stationmates out to dinner. A meal is an easy way for people to connect.
Relocating is stressful for most people, but it can be especially difficult for military personnel and first responders. You have built friendships around common experiences and interests, and the memories you have made with your current friends on base and stationmates are difficult to replicate. However, establishing successful friendships is an important part of adjusting to a new base or station. By following the advice listed above, you may have an easier time making friends in your new location.